During a scheduled c-section, Dekar was born live at 10:46 am on June 27, 2008, and met the eyes of Jesus at 7:10 pm the same day. He passed peacefully in my arms, surrounded by his eight siblings and father.
He weighed 4 lbs 14 oz, 18″ long. He was precious and beautiful. You can read the full story of his birth and short life on this post.
I created this blog to share his life with others–Dekar gave us a lifetime of love and now we are sharing him with you.
His short life is worth remembering, so I felt Remember the Life was a fitting title for a blog created in his memory.
After getting the news that Dekar would not live, I had prayed that God would somehow get glory in a tragic situation. I have been questioning, how God can get glory in the death of a little baby? I admit that I have been looking for some huge firework display, but now realize that He has been and will be getting glory in the many, individual little sparks.
I’m blessed that I was able to hold Dekar and experience his life. The term that I often heard was “incompatible with life”. That term must have originated by somebody who doesn’t believe in God and His power. Dekar’s life was TOTALLY compatible with my life, no matter how short it was and I thank God for him.
9 comments
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August 24, 2010 at 12:45 am
amy friskey
when i was 17 i got pregnant and when i was 18 i gave birth to a stillborn baby boy who was only 21 weeks gestational. its been almost a year and i am still grieving. i am now pregnant again with a baby and so far i’ve made it past 21 weeks this time. if any one wants to contact me please feel free to write to my email address hltlersmom at yahoo dot com. thanks
February 3, 2011 at 4:33 pm
Madge
Amy, how are you doing now?
June 10, 2011 at 10:25 pm
Craig Decker
I am replying for Amy! She has had some problems and I am sure needs some support. She did have a healthy baby boy and we named him Drezden Jack Decker. After that, she became pregnant again, and tragicaly lost Julianna at around 21 weeks too. Now, at the moment, Drezden is 8 months old and I have him. He is doing wonderful! Amy has not fully recovered and I am scared to think that it is destroying her mentally. I do love her and wish and hope that she gets the help and support she needs. At the time being, she considers me the enemy. You can contact her with prayers and support on facebook Amy_Dawn1991@yahoo.com thanks everybody.
June 9, 2010 at 6:23 am
sharon hall
Hi Marge, our computer decided to go to sleep a few months ago and i have lost your email now. would love to keep in touch again. we are all going well Charlize would have been 10 months old now, i can’t imagine it. please send me a quick hello so i can get your email again. much love to you xxx sharon
December 2, 2009 at 8:24 pm
John Ennis
After having lost a newborn 3 days ago, I was searching for help writing an obituary. I stumbled upon this page and found the help I needed. I also found that there are many people that have gone through what I have experienced and have found peace in similar ways such as Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep. If you are interested, my wife has documented our story in loridoesmd.blogspot.com.
August 14, 2009 at 3:03 am
Carolyn Pruett
Thank you for posting your birth plan. I’m opting for induction @ 33 weeks because survivability isn’t an issue for us and 32 weeks is considered fullterm. The reality of delivering another stillborn or one who’ll die shortly thereafter is creating HUGE anxiety for me and I just want it over as soon as it’s safe to do so. After losing a son to medical incompetence/cord accident @ the hands of Kaiser (insurance HMO), we thought our prayers had been answered with a surprise pregnancy @ age 40 which turned into a nightmare called Trisomy 13 and holoprosencephaly. We still will have no LIVING children. Note to self to never pray for anything again if this is how a supposedly loving god answers. There is truly no quota on grief.
June 24, 2009 at 9:51 pm
Mirna
I am so sorry for your loss…. he is such a beautiful baby. Soon he celebrates his first birthday too. Hug to you 🙂
May 14, 2009 at 2:37 am
sharon hall
WOW!! I have been searching for someone and i found you! My baby girl is due to be with us in 9 short weeks a day i am eagerly awaiting and dreading her day, she also has T18 and hypoplastic left heart. So desperate to find someone who has a similar diagnosis to find out more, what to expect and wow I am not as alone in this world after all, her name is Charlize Rose and ……… i can’t wait to meet my own angel xxx
March 24, 2009 at 11:23 am
mssimmo
he’s a beautiful baby, I’m glad you were able to experience his love…if only for a moment.