Shortly after coming home from the hospital I told the family that the 27th of every month will be “Ice Cream for Dekar” day. This is a way that we can keep Dekar’s memory alive, and it’s a fun thing to do. I would get hassled by my family that I would go out for ice cream so much while pregnant—but I loved feeling Dekar kick and ice cream seemed to do it for him! I don’t know if it was the sugar or the coolness, but he reacted. Since we had gotten his diagnosis of Trisomy 18 and hypoplastic left heart, those kicks became even more precious to me. I looked forward to each outing and the movements that would soon follow.
So, July 27th we all went out for our first “Dekar Day”. My oldest son said, while licking ice cream, “I’m sure glad that Dekar didn’t like meatloaf. I mean, what would be the fun of having meatloaf every month.” 🙂
Eating the ice cream brings back fond memories for me. It also conveys to the kids who may not otherwise remember Dekar that their little brother is worth remembering and celebrating.
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February 27, 2009
Today Dekar would have been eight months old.
Sigh.
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I have rootbeer and ice-cream ready to go for tomorrow. (March 26, 2009)
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On Dekar’s first birthday we all had ice cream cones covered with sprinkles. What was so funny to me was hearing from several friends that on Dekar’s birthday they ALSO had ice cream with sprinkles! I’ll never look at ice-cream with sprinkles the same!
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December 9, 2009 at 10:51 pm
Dekar’s Memorial Ornament, 2009–It’s so perfect! «
[…] looked with me, and it was so perfect when he showed me the ice cream cone–it even has sprinkles! Helpful […]
October 30, 2009 at 11:00 pm
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[…] “Dekar Day”–the 27th of every month–how we remember Dekar on a monthly basis […]
September 30, 2009 at 12:42 pm
Angi
I too had a baby with Trisomy 18. His name was Dominic and he was born on March 27, 1998. He lived just about 2 hours. I love your idea of making a special day to remember him. My kids still ask about him often.
Unfortunately, we didn’t get many pictures. I wish I had been able to think of all of your great ideas to remember your sweet baby.