You are currently browsing the category archive for the ‘memorial item’ category.

For the last several months I have been wearing a very special necklace that I picked out from JewelryKeepsakes.com.

I am not much of a jewelry person, so when I do wear something it is usually pretty special to me.

This particular necklace can also hold a small amount of personal remains of a loved one.

I have seen these before and honestly wasn’t sure how I felt about it.  But now that I have one I am very glad I own it.  It is my preferred piece of jewelry–It is stylish, well made, and nobody can tell what it holds inside.  Basically, it simply looks like a very pretty piece of jewelry.  Nobody knows it holds a small part of my son’s remains unless I tell them…and I don’t offer that information.
Image

The necklace came with a small funnel and toothpick to help the flow of ashes into the small opening.  I had no real issue with the process of filling the necklace.  If a larger piece of remain did not fit through the funnel I was able to push it out and try a different portion of ashes. The toothpick wasn’t extremely strong, though, and it did break.  That was the only issue I had with filling the necklace with some of Dekar’s remains.

The opening on the top of the necklace is closed with a little screw.  This shut tight since I was careful to not overfill.  Originally I did not use the adhesive product that was sent with the necklace. It seemed to me the screw was secure so I did not think it needed the extra adhesive. However, after wearing the necklace almost daily for a few weeks I found myself checking the necklace regularly, making sure the pendant was still in place!  I decided to buy some strong adhesive and securing the screw permanently. Once I secured the screw with some adhesive I feel more peaceful, knowing the pendant cannot accidentally come loose.

The chain itself is something I need to have fixed.  The clasp is very difficult to attach to the other end as the opening is quite small. I have contacted the company and was assured this can be fixed/replaced.  I just haven’t done it yet due to the craziness of life lately.

I really love this necklace and am so glad to own it. Even if I didn’t have some of Dekar’s remains in the necklace I believe it would be a favorite necklace because of the special picture of a mother cradling her child’s head.
As far as the service itself from JewelryKeepsakes.com, I couldn’t be more pleased.  The shipping was prompt and the communication was excellent.
(ETA after posting:  I just want to say that when I worked on this post it looked perfect as far as spacing, formatting, etc.  But once I published it the “perfect” look disappeared!  I don’t have the time or talent to figure out how to make my son’s memory blog look excellent all the time….but hopefully those who come here look beyond all of that stuff.  I just wanted to vent a bit because I find this VERY frustrating!) 
Advertisements

October 15th is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day.

Today we remember the babies who were born asleep,

the babies whom we carried but never met,

the babies we have held but could not take home,

and the babies who made it home, but didn’t stay.

I will have a whole new family to join up in heaven!–Dekar and six (known) miscarried babies.

A candle will be lit at 7 pm in honor of them and all babies gone too soon.

After getting Dekar’s diagnosis my husband’s co-worker/friend gave a pot of beautiful roses to us.  I started calling them Dekar’s Roses. 
 
At one time last summer there were nine beautiful blooms on one of the plants–one for each of my children!
 
Since I do not have a green thumb I transplanted the roses in three different areas, hoping at least one plant would survive.  This year only one plant is doing well. (I really do not have a green thumb!)
 
  These pictures were taken last year. 
 
 
Dekar’s Roses

 

 

The month of Dekar’s birthday has been funky for me the last two years.  If you have lost somebody special in your life you may understand.  For me this means I may be more somber and melancholy.  Other times I’ll want to keep busy and do something productive to pass the time. Some days I’ll notice I’m simply out of sorts–in a funk! 

As time has gone on I’ve recognized this as my way of working through the grief and acceptance of losing Dekar.  These things don’t catch me off guard or make me question myself as they used to.  I just take them as they come. Grief is a weird thing and definitely different for everybody.

Since this is Dekar’s birthday month I am going to post a new picture or memory of Dekar when I feel the need to help me work through the “funk”.

Day One–Dekar’s Roses

Day Two–Dekar’s Smile

A beautiful and unique Valentine created by “Landon’s Gift” on Facebook. 

It took almost two years, but I finally found the perfect urn for Dekar.  This was purchased through Perfect Memorials

Front with engraved writing.

Top, where a large candle can be placed

Inside where the cremains (or other momentos) can go. Top can be sealed permanently, if desired.

back

This does not include all the pages and links posted–And it’s also not necessarily in order. (If you come across any dead links I would really appreciate knowing about them.  Please use “contact” form.  Thanks!)

Dekar’s Obituary and other SAMPLE INFANT OBITUARIES 

Dekar gave us a lifetime of Love during his short time on earthwhat I sent out to inform people of Dekar’s birth and passing–it’s his story, in a nutshell.

Babies with Trisomy 13 or 18 (Dekar is included)YouTube video made by NILMDTS with images of T13/T18 babies

Slideshow of our time with Dekar, courtesy of Now I Lay Me Down to Sleepthe slideshow made for us by NILMDTS.  Danielle Felton took the pictures and Christine Barrack made the slideshow. 

“Dekar Day”–the 27th of every monthhow we remember Dekar on a monthly basis

Praying for a Miracle; Planning for a funeralhow I continued on after Dekar’s diagnosis and the plans I made for his arrival and passing.  This is not what a pregnancy is suppose to “look” like.   I also talk about regrets I have, the grace I gave myself,  and what I wish I could do differently.

My Experience with NILMDTSI had never heard of Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep before-so I wrote about my experience with them so others would understand them a bit more from a parent’s perspective.

The Heavy Burden of Empty Armswhat others don’t see when they look at me….

A Full LifeDekar had one!

Dekar’s Memorial Ornament, 2008 and 2009

HopeLink to Steven Curtis Chapman’s song WITH HOPE, along with lyrics.  It’s a beautiful song that I discovered soon after finding Dekar’s first memorial ornament.

A nurse’s thoughts and perspective on the birth of Dekar–my main nurse graciously shared her thoughts and gave me permission to share them.

Forever an infantas my other children grow, Dekar remains forever an infant

Dekar’s Name in the Sandone lady’s mission to help remember other babies who died too soon.

My Mom, A Pair of Shoes, and other poemsI just like these poems–I am adding as I find them.  Updated 11/06/11

I guess…some people have never said anything about the passing of my son…..

Dekar Day, another loss, faithful friends, and a random act of kindnessthe title just about covers it

Bittersweet milestone

First Mother’s Day without Dekar

The babies that were meant just for me

Happy Birthday, DekarDekar’s first birthday a small pictorial tribute to his short life

I Miss Dekar

Dekar’s Foot Impression and 3d Foot and Hand molds and another memory item

Strength–Coping with the very end result of the “Incompatible With Life” diagnosisthe hardest part was not knowing if I could handle holding my deceased infant son. 

Smiling for SharonSharon’s daughter, Charlize, was diagnosed the same as Dekar–hypoplastic heart and Trisomy 18.  Charlize blessed her family with 58 days!  She is a beautiful little girl and I’m so glad Sharon shared her life with me.

The Mourning Boothnot sure what to say or do for somebody who is mourning?  Watch this. 

A Pleasant Reminderone small effort is forever ingrained in my memory as one of the kindest actions I have ever experienced in my life.

Still Making Memoriesa memorial snowglobe created by a talented photographer/friend.

Dekar’s 22nd month in heaven–a letter to Dekar

Final Diagnosis–Trisomy 18the email I sent to family and friends to relate the news of our baby’s Trisomy 18/hypoplastic left heart diagnosis 

Congratulations to Sharon and family on the birth of Charlize Rose!

Sharon gave birth to a beautiful little baby girl with Trisomy 18 and hypoplastic left heart on July 29th.  Today she  is enjoying her 27th day with her!!!  It simply makes me smile.  I am so happy that Charlize is being surrounded by the love of her family and giving love in return–I pray she has 27 more, and 27  more, and 27 more, and ……………….

Sharon shared some of the most wonderful, touching pictures with me–I posted just a few.  Isn’t Charlize gorgeous?

DSC00078

From an earlier email Sharon said, “She is in the most wonderful wrapping Marge, just like your Dekar.”  I love that.   What a perfect way to describe our babies–in a “wonderful wrapping.”

DSC00211DSC00276DSC00137 

Enjoy your time together, Sharon, and thank you for sharing your message of hope.

DSC00274

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

%d bloggers like this: